Food Total: 1649 cals
Exercise Minutes: 35 mins
Soooooooo, I have 1.4 lbs left to lose before the end of the month to get to my second of six mini-goals. If I can do it, I will be six weeks ahead of my goal schedule.
Also, I need to add seven more minutes to my run on Saturday to attain my 30 minute challenege to myself.
Can I do it?
Right now, my maintenance calories are ~ 3,400 per day. So, I'd have to net ~1,200 calories per day over these two days to make it. Yesterday's net was around 1,200. I think I can do it again today.
The seven more minutes? Right now I'm not feeling like I can do it. My left knee has a teeny-tiny bit of pain in it. We'll see, though. I felt amazing after the workout yesterday--and I am still recovering from the dumb cold. If the knee feels better tomorrow morning, those 7 minutes are mine, baby!
Oh, I also got below 290 yesterday! Yay for me. Next goal, to be half way through my loss, will be 262. I'm very excited about that number. That is very very close to the 250's and I haven't seen that since I was 20/21-nearly 10 years ago. That was my lowest adult weight, as well.
Food Total: 1938 cals
Exercise Minutes: 68 mins
This cold is really kicking me in the arse. I haven't been to the gym since Sunday. But, we are going tonight after work. I am not going to make my goal of being able to run 30 minutes by the end of the week. That is okay. I didn't fail, I had a cold.
My kiddo leaves for Nebraska on Saturday and I am very much looking forward to THREE WEEKS ALONE WITH THE LOVE OF MY LIFE. We are both very excited about it. Three weeks of quality time together, childless. WooHoo! I am also taking vacation July 3 and 5 so I will get 5 days of childless marital bliss.
Still no takers on the house. I lowered the price due to the flooring issues so we will see if that helps the process along any. I really thought it would be leased by now, but we just aren't getting any lease showings. Weird. I am going to finish the required painting next weekend and try to paint over at least one of the colored rooms. After this weekend, I will have had three weekends in a row of R & R...now it's time to get back to work!
Update: I decided to log today because I am curious as to where I have been and how accurate my guesses were. I was 70 calories off, not bad. I looked for a way to log my jogging tonight, but I gues no one jogs at 4.0 MPH. The jogging doesn't start until 5.0 MPH in the database. I'm slow. But you gotta start somewhere. I am going to run until I cannot run any longer and see how far I get. Who knows, maybe I'll make that 30 minutes, afterall? I am very excited to get to the gym tonight because I want to see what my body is capable of. I wonder if jogging at 4.0 is more difficult than jogging at 5.0? Who cares, I guess. I'll figure it out.
Hubby decided he wanted to do the random program on the stationary bike in the cardio area rather than take the spinning class tonight. I get to watch him work out. He's sooo sexy. Watching all of his muscles relax and contract like that really gets me going. I always watch the other men on the bikes when I am on the treadmill but tongiht, I GET TO WATCH MINE!!!
More: 23 MINUTES at 4.1 MPH I may make my 30 minute goal, after all. I still have Saturday to add 7 more minutes. I can do it!
I am a selfish person. I have known this about myself for a long time. I try not to be selfish, but I suppose that is a natural tendancy--you know, self preservation, and all.
There are people on this site that I wish I would write to more often in support, friendship, whatever. I think all of you are wonderfully interesting people. I read your blogs and I read some of your posts on the forums. I am not consistent in any of this and I wish I would be unselfish enough to reach out to each of you. But I don't.
One of my co-workers just had a hysdirectomy and EVERYBODY is pooling together to buy her stuff and we have all signed up to make her dinner one night. I was very annoyed by this--out of selfishness. My internal response: She's having a hysdirectomy, she didn't lose a limb or a family member! WTF??? Why don't we just send her a company boquet of flowers and leave her alone?I know, pretty bad, eh?
So, I hastily gave my $10 to the one other woman in our group who was spearheading the purchase of something for her. I told everyone in the meeting that I would want to just be left alone. I don't want more crap to fill up my house. Some of the guys agreed, but we HAVE to do something for her...whatever. I'm aweful. This has really been bothering me since Monday.
I am a very giving person, when it is something I choose to get behind. I just really hope nothing ever happens to me and the office tries to do "something nice" for me like that. Leave me alone and keep your crap. If you really want to part with your money and resources, devote it to a cause that really needs like it like a church, a homeless shelter, a crisis intervention center. I don't need your shit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay, anyway...glad I got that out. And it isn't about the $10. It is about what that money represents, and what better uses it could have been put to besides some fuzzy slippers and suntan lotion to someone who already has plenty. Grrrrrr.
I was really hoping to get my run back and go to the gym every morning this week. Buuuuuuuut, Noooo! I HAD TO GET SICK!!! I'm so disappointed. We have plans to go to the gym tonight, but only if I can breathe through my nose. So far, not too sure about that.
I finally got the first draft of my technical writing project submitted to the client this morning. 1 day later than I had planned. Not bad. Now I get to go back to Atlanta in two weeks because they changed some of their processes and installed new software last week. It's okay, though. Just two days. I'm staying at a different hotel this time.
I need to go see about my expense report. I don't get a corporate card until I've been here 90 days so I get to foot the bill and get reimbursed. I can't afford another trip until they reimburse me for the last one! Hopefully the airfare won't be so expensive this time!
Carpet cleaning guy went to the house this morning. Diagnosis: needs replacement, cannot be cleaned.
I need to make a decision about where I want to go with this house up there. Do I want to keep renting it out? If I do, I will have to replace the carpeting and repaint the entire house and take down my two remaining roman shades and replace them with blinds.
Or, do I want to reduce the price and sell it?
Those short-term tenants still want the house and are willing to give me almost all of my premium. They don't want the house until August 1. That would give me plenty of time to get the floors re-done. Problem is $. How much will it cost? I don't know. If I keep it, I would replace the hall carpet with tile and replace the kitchen, utility room, and hall bath linoleum with tile. Less carpet to tear up, and I could then have it replaced by room becuase there would be tile seperating all the rooms.
I either do this and keep this house as a rental or I can let these short-term prospects live in it as-is then sell it at a reduced price. My old tenants made it very clear they think I am being too harsh and I doubt I could get them to pay for having the carpet replaced. Even though their dogs ruined it, not me. I think if I gave them the bill, they would contest it in court. Even though I would win, I would then have to shoulder the expense of an attorney, my time at the court 300 miles away (and not at work) and just an over-all huge headache. I am an accountant. You do not throw away good money to chase after the bad!
Decisions, decisions.
Update: They retracted their offer. I am going to lower the price of the sales listing in light of the flooring problems and see how it goes. Hubby and I decided not to keep the house. That is probably the best thing to do for us. We don't really need to be sinking any more money into it.
Once we re-group out here, I can get some local property.
Today's run was 15 minutes at 4.0 MPH (no incline). Yeehaw! Ten minute warm up and 10 minute cool down. Weird thing was I noticed my left foot kept skidding on the treadmill and I had to launch myself higher when I was coming off my right foot and I could totally feel the height difference. I thought something was amiss since my left heel keeps slipping in and out of my shoe. I tried to explain it to the guy at the running store, but he wouldn't listen! So, I took my insert out of my left shoe and my foot is not slipping in and out anymore. I am walking in them to get accustom to the difference but I think this will be a good thing.
I also noticed that after my 15 minute run that it was a little uncomfotable to walk at 3.5 MPH. I slowed it down to 3.4 and it was more comfortable. I don't get it. My leg muscles are yelling at me. I guess you use your muscles differently when running than you do when walking!
I'm hoping for 30 minutes by the end of the week. I want to add 5 minutes a day to my jog time until I get to 30. I could have kept going after my 15 today, but I want to ease into this thing. I am still VERY excited about this accomplishment.
I had a date day with my son today. We went to target and I bought him two new toys (as he hasn't received any outside of birthday and Christmas for over a year) and I bought myself a new iPod and headphones. Then we went to the gym and I did cardio while he was in the child center then we went swimming together for a while. Then, we went out to lunch. He really needed some time to feel special--now that all this chaos is, for the most part, behind us. Our relationship has been strainied lately. He told me that I was the nicest Mom in the planet today. I really enjoyed our afternoon together.
I ran!!! For the first time in over 8 years I was able to run again! I did it for 10 minutes on the TM at 3.7MPH--with my random incline, nonetheless. I know, no speed records getting broken here...but I did it. My motivation is all renewed now and I am SOOOOOOOOOOO happy.
Also, despite the train wreck of a week I thought I have been having in the food department, I managed to drop 2 lbs. My jaw almost hit the floor, seriously. I was expecting to hold steady or to even creep up an ounce or two. I guess I don't have as good a handle on this calorie-counting thing that I thought I had. However, I was listening to my body--except the sweets, that is.
My realtor sent me a new lease on the house in Dallas. I'm not sure what happened, but the terms were all screwed up, and there was no short-term lease premium like I had told them I would require for the 6-month lease. They didn't have ANY pets, THANK GOD, but if they want my house for 6 months, they will pay me a premium. Call it a keep-Cindy-sane premium, if you will.
So, I told my hubby that I am going to go to the gym every morning this next week (at 5AM) because I want to get my run back, and I want to get to my 8/12/06 goal by 6/30/06 which requires a 2.4 lb loss this next week. I am 7 ounces away from being under 290 lbs. Yaaahooo!
Off to sit in the yard I have been working hard on and to enjoy a glass of wine with the love of my life.
Drama...too much drama. My tenants were VERY upset about not getting their deposit back. Wanted to know why I didn't tell them there was so much wrong with the house so that they had the opportunity to fix it before I spent their money. S'cuse me? Were you not LIVING in the place for 10 months??? Did you not have all that time to take care of it? Did YOU not give me the keys back when you were done and quit paying rent? Do I really need to remind you that YOU put holes in the walls and YOU let your dogs soil the carpet? And that YOU let your mangy mutts destroy my backyard? Am I missing something here? UN-FREEKIN-BELIEVABLE!!!! Seriously.
So, being the nice person that I am, I gave them permission to go back into the house to see the what is left of the damage. There are still repairs to be made. I'll give them the opportunity to make them because the Mr. really is handy, and does good work. I really can't believe this. How do you hang something, take it down, remove the drywall anchors from the walls and NOT REALIZE THERE IS A WHOLE TO BE PATCHED x 12???? OMG.
There is someone interested in buying the place. I should hear something soon about that. Only one person interested in a 6 month lease. I'm not interested in that at all after these that just left! I said I'd do it if they had no dogs and were willing to pay a $250 per month premium. Never heard back from that offer! Ha.
I'm glad today is Friday and I get my second weekend at home. Some more yard work is on the agenda, along with more unpacking and a trip to the gym. I also promised my tenants I would detail out all the money I spent on the house so that we can come to some kind of amicable closure. After all, they were really good tenants until they left the place in that condition...and really nice people.
I got my new driver's license in the mail last night. My, I am looking pretty good! <
>. This is the first time I have ever liked my DL picture! I looked at my picture for a good 3 - 5 minutes in amazement! It's astounding what ~50 pounds of weight loss and 6 good years will do for ya!
Now, I get to go to court in an hour and explain to the judge why, exactly, I was driving 51 in a 35 on an expired driver's license. Oy vey! Baaaaaaad Cindy.
On a more positive note, I am feeling back to my normal self and headed to the gym after work tonight. I am even more in love with my job than I was two months ago and I hope this trend continues!
Update: I lost track of time at work today...
No gym, out to dinner, tummy ache, thirsty. 18oz. of mudslides?????? What the____ WAS I thinking? Someone shoot me know and put me out of my own misery.
I got a cold yesterday afternoon and we didn't go to the gym last night. I went to bed at 9:00--which is early for me. I ate like I used to eat a few years ago..well, sort of. I guess it wasn't nearly that bad, but it sure seemed like it. I need to get back to my normal, healthier ways. Today is a new day and I started it off better with Kashi, 1/2 banana and my morning coffee with prince charming. I am still not feeling so good, though. I am having a lean cuisine panini for lunch (left-overs from the roach motel days). I also brought some left over roasted chicken to supplement it. Don't know what's for dinner, though. If I'm feeling better, we will prepare the fresh veggies I bought yesterday and have salad and french bread. If I'm not feeling better, it will be interesting...
I'm hoping for no weight gain this week. I seriously doubt I have eaten enough crap to actually gain weight, but not losing is just as bad in my eyes. I've got to get my life put back together!
Oh, I am dropping my coffee-mate creamer because it has "corn syrup solids" in it. What the hell is a corn syrup solid??? I am switching to organic half and half. It is less calories (because I use less of that than I do the chemical creamer) and is composed of only organic milk and cream. There is a micro-step in the right direction, I suppose?
I wish my sunburn would quit hurting. Yesterday wasn't too good in the food department, I think. I didn't eat enough crap to gain any weight, but was probably a little too close to that maintenace calorie level. I am eating this crap because the quality of my food has declined lately. We are working on getting that back on track.
Tonight is gym night. We are trying to establish a new workout routine. I, of course, want everything back to the way it was NOW. I don't want to work back into it. But, I know that is unrealistic, too. Sometimes I'm not a very patient person.
I came home last night to all of the flowers I planted over the weekend near-dead. That sucked. I really thought I had watered them enough to go 24 hours without water. I was wrong. It looks like most of them will survive, but some of them have more damage than others. I'll see how it looks tonight when I get home and decide to replace them, or not. It is supposed to rain for a couple days out here, but I went ahead and watered them some this morning because of how distressed they were last night.
I was also able to find a pretty magnolia tree on clearance for $14 at the store. It needs some TLC. So, I re-potted it in a large pot last night and started the process of straightening it up. I love southern magnolias. They are my favorite tree. This will be a gorgeous tree when it matures. I decided to pot it until we buy a house. I wouldn't want to leave this gorgeous tree behind if we can't buy this house. It is young enough that it looks good in a pot. I still have some left-over zinnias that I will plant in that pot as soon as I can. Maybe the rain will hold off long enough for me to finish my planting this evening?
Update: I have been hungry all morning--well, more like two days, really. I ate 2 slices of cinnamon bread, and 1 tbsp of margarine at 7AM, about 1/2 c of left-over potato salad at 10AM, then 6 oz. shrimp with 1/8 c of tartar at 11AM, then left over spaghetti (about 2 srv) and 1 1/2 c of raw cherry tomato's, carrots and broccoli at 12PM. Also had about 9 cups of water...I think the hungries are FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY gone. FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Woooooohooooooo.
I was really worried I was going to eat everything in sight today. I felt that way yesterday but didn't do it. Why am I so hungry, anyway? I wonder if it is because I haven't been taking my bc pill lately. That thing is supposed to keep my testosterone levels in check (and my acne at bay), but if I don't take it...too much testosterone is bad for me and my weight loss efforts (and my complexion). Why, oh why, do I do these things? How hard is it, really, to remember to take one little teeny-tiny pill a day for three weeks each month? I mean, really? C'mon, me! I can do this.
I am feeling especially positive about my body this morning. I am wearing one of the new tops I found last week that actully fits me well and I feel pretty.
I am also feeling hungry and it is only 11AM. The cheerios didn't last too long. Hopefully the 1/2 chicken breast and rice pilaf will tie me over for a few hours. I am having my doubts right now. I wish I had some vegetables to go with it. Why didn't I add some frozen veggies? The thought crossed my mind but I didn't act. Shame on me! Perhaps a trip to the store for some baby carrots is in my immediate future? Yeah, that sounds good...
Update: Went to lunch early only to find a big ol' tray of fresh veggies on the lunchroom table. Yay! I am very satiated right now and will probably be that way the remainder of the evening. I love veggies.
My thoughts on toxic people...I read some people's blogs regularly. Others I read periodically. I am stricken today by people who hang out with toxic people. These are choices we make. No one forces us to spend time with toxic people. We decide to, or not to, do it.
Given the choice between spending time with a toxic person and not spending time with a toxic person, which would you choose? That seems like the simplest of questions to me. This is one of those things about people I can not comprehend. I don't care if that toxic person has my genes, is the person who signs my paycheck, or is the last person on the face of the world, I would choose to NOT spend my precious life moments with that toxic person. Where is the value? How in the world could that benefit me and my existence?
Toxic people drain you of your happiness, your fortitude, your joy, your eqilibrium, your purpose, your spirit and your overall will to live in some cases. Maybe this is a type of suicidal behavior? I just don't get it.
There is not one single person alive who has the right to take those things from me. They are mine to choose to posess or to choose to give away. Either way, they are mine and I get to choose what to do with them. Why is that so hard to understand? My sweet prince charming says that I "don't get it" and that "it isn't that easy to just choose to be happy, joyous, etc." But, I know it is. I chose to have it, just like every other happy person out there. It is very much a conscious decision, not circumstantial.
"I would be happy if only..." That is one of the worst things we can ever tell ourselves. Find the happiness where you are right now or you never will. I can promise you that. Been there. Done that. Have battle wounds to prove it.
I love making my home beautiful!
When we moved into this house, the landscape and yard were in serious distress. No one had been here to care for it (including water) in four months. I haven't had much time before this weekend to do anything except give it some water. This weekend I cleared out the flowerbeds, turned the soil, fertilized the soil and grass, trimmed back the overgrown bushes, cut the dead limbs from the very young oak tree that I wasn't sure was going to make it, dug up a 10 ft oleander (which was in a 3 ft stip of property), planted some zinnias in the flower beds, and mulched. What a huge difference! The lawn is still in need of serious re-habilitation, but that will just take time.
I put down some weed and feed yesterday morning and it rained really hard early this morning-dang it dang it dang it! I'm hoping it will do some good, anyway. I have some crab-grass killing spray that I am going to go work on in a little bit. After all the weeds die, there won't be much left to the lawn at all. But, after a few weeks, I can over-seed it.
Update on the large financial risk: The biggest part of that has not only ended well, but ended better than I ever could have hoped. The smaller part is still pending. What I did, for those of you following the saga, was I signed up for a third house payment. We had the one house in Dallas that is now vacant, the lease in Houston that we still had 9 months on, and then I signed a two-year lease on this place in San Antonio. The house in Houston was the biggest of the three house payments and not only has another tenant signed a lease on that place, but they want it now, so we will get some of our rent back.
I had the option of staying in the roach motel for 60 days, then working from the house in Houston until it leased, but I felt like God was telling me to lease this house in San Antonio (which I got one hell of a deal on, by the way) and to have faith that He had this planned out and I don't have to worry. So, I did just that, despite the absence of any kind of logic whatsoever. I am very controlling in my finacial life and that was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. Having faith is not the easiest thing in the world to do, sometimes!!! But, like I told my Mom when she told me I was out of my mind, I will rely on my faith until it fails me.
Off to continue the beautification process...
Yesterday was judgement day. It has been a few weeks since I was at the gym last and able to weigh myself. I also have been trying to listen to my body and have not been logging/planning my meals. The scale registered a 4.42 loss in about 3 1/2 weeks. I am also down 4.25" in that time period, as well. That was a period of no regular exercise, but high activity; and one week of recovery with next to no activity.
So what this tells me is that I have the ability to listen to my body and my body can lose weight all by itself (so to speak). I ate out a large majority of that time, as well. I am incredibly happy right now. The changes are real and lasting. You can succeed at changing your eating habits and your body can lose weight without it being this huge, emotional ordeal!!!!
I am now 8 little pounds away from my second (of 6) mini-goals. Now that my life is a little more settled, I can push myself to shed those 8 pounds by the end of June. However, I think I am going to go back and adjust all of my weigh-in's to accomodate for the scale change in May. That was about a 4-5 lb. difference.
I am sooooooo happy today. Well, except that I lost some of my "ability" at the gym over that three week period. I had to knock the treadmill down to 3.3 mph and the random incline down 1 level--and I was still struggling!
I went back and adjusted all my check-in's prior to the new gym (and my goal sheet). I am now only 4.3 lbs away from my second mini-goal. I'm such a cheater. Ha! And.....48 lbs gone since 2/8/06.
Yay. I get to leave Atlanta tomorrow afternoon. I am going to go shopping tonight at the mall as there are some department stores here that we do not have in Texas. Shopping has been incredibly frustrating for me lately, but I MUST find a few more professional-style tops. I have about two that fit me and the rest fit me 45+ pounds ago so they look like tents now. I am hoping to find two. Maybe I'll even luck into a nice pair of slacks? Probably not. Slacks are even more difficult because of my height, especially in department stores.
I am all but finished here onsite so I am a little bored. I have one last shipping process to document (if there is going to be a shipment ready today) and as soon as I document it, I am outa here. I have to give an oral systems presentation to all the people I have worked with here tomorrow morning, to make sure I got it all right, and then I am free to go. I will finish preparing for that this evening.
I don't feel so icky-bloated-fat today. That is a very good thing. I've also been on my feet all day out in the warehouse, so I got in some of that much-needed movement. A light lunch of blackened tilapia and steamed veggies and a lighter breakfast helped, too. I'm going to keep dinner VERY light tonight, as well. I'm hoping the mall will have some kind of deli where I can get fruit and yogurt, or something like that. Something cool, creamy, and naturally sweet sounds very nice right now.
Update: Mission accomplished. Not only did I find two new tops today, but
I found a new source for slacks THAT ARE NOT TOO SHORT. I do believe I hear the halelejua chorus in the backround! I didn't find my fruit, however. So, I got a grilled chicken and black bean wrap from the food court. It wasn't bad but I am very hungry right now. I am also feeling energetic so I really need to tap into that will-power to not go in search of food! I want ice cream. I don't know where to obtain it, though. But, the rental car does have unlimited mileage. Baaaaaad Cindy.
So, I flew to Atlanta, got a car, a hotel, and I went to the client site today. Guess what...my main point of contact IS ON VACATION THE ENTIRE WEEK. The COO was pissed, of course, but didn't they know? They had to sign the proposal, they picked the week...I don't get it. They say to get what I can done and just plan on coming back out for another day or two someday soon. Must be nice to just be able to throw away that money! They have to pay for all my travel expenses and my time to actually travel.
I am feeling like eating, but I am also feeling bloated. I'm hoping to stay distracted until it is too late to eat anything. The treadmill here looks kinda scary so I decided not to use it. I'm probably just making excuses not to exercise. I want to eat and rest. But I should NOT eat and move. Good thing there aren't any places to obtain food nearby. I'm feeling too f'n lazy to actually get in the car and go get it. I suck today.
Update: $0.75 in my wallet = peanut M & M's in my tummy.
Does it count that I got lost finding the vending machine and had to walk around the entire hotel with a full ice bucket? It must have weighed AT LEAST 2 lbs! Can I count that 3 to 4 minutes of exercise AND weight lifting?
I suck even more today, now. I feel like a big, fat, overstuffed arm chair today...
Busy busy busy today. My drivers license expired on my birthday and I forgot about it with all of the insanity in my life. Well, the nice little police officer who gave me a ticket for speeding about two weeks ago reminded me that it was expired...and wrote me a ticket for that, too. What a gentleman! So, I have been procrastinating because I really didn't want to tell the boss I needed time off work to do it. But, the plain fact of having an expired drivers license will prevent me from getting on the plane on Sunday, put a quick halt on getting a rental car in Atlanta, and a lot of other untold problems. So, I fessed up, told him that I had to go to court because of this whole mess on the 22nd, and he laughed at me and told me to go and that things like this come up from time to time. We are always hardest on ourselves, aren't we?
It is all taken care of, now (except the court date), and I feel like a huge pressure has been lifted off my body.
I am trying to get ready to be gone for a whole week, man I got a lot to get done. I still have 4.5 hours left. I can do it!
Update: Amazingly enough, and two unexpected problems later, I managed to get all my work done and only worked an extra half hour. Not bad. And I now have three happy clients right before I leave. No one will be waiting to hear from me, and I will not be holding any of my co-workers projects up because I got it all done. I felt like I accomplished a lot this week and I love that feeling. It has been 18 - 24 months since I felt productive at work. That is such an important part of who I am, that if I am not productive at work, I do not feel like a successful person.
I have been very happy with all aspects of of life, except my work, over the past few years. What a difference it makes in me when I am happy at work. The super-sized house was bothering me in Houston, but now that is no longer an issue, either. I wonder what I will feel like when I get my house in Dallas back in tip-top shape, get this house fully unpacked, and get an entire weekend to recoup? I can't wait to experience that. It will probably be close to nirvana, baby! Two weeks and I should get to do it...just two weeks.
Next week I will be working out every night at the hotel's fitness center. By time I return, I should be ready to start my regular gym trips back up. That will be wonderful, too.
Ahhhh, I can walk in almost no pain, now. Still hurts a little to squat or bend over, but I can definitely live with that! Perhaps I will be all better tomorrow? Now THAT would be nice.
I am finding myself consistently only wanting healthy foods in relatively normal portions. I feel like I have turned a corner in this lifestyle change thing. Today, I believe, marks exactly four months since I started back to the gym and started changing my eating habits and learning about food and portion sizes. It is also my anniversary and I forgot until just now. Oops, better call prince charming. Betcha he forgot, too. LOL.
Anyway, I have lost about 45 - 50 lbs in those four months. I've also shrank somewhere around 24 inches in that time. Through a job loss, a job gain, living in a hotel, traveling back and forth for three weeks, a relocation, and problem tenants I have managed to keep this up and not revert to my old ways. I will officially call them dead at this point. If they did not resurrect through the stress of the last 60 days, they aren't revivable! A memorial service will NOT be held in their honor as they will not be missed. No one liked them, anyway.
Logging my food has become a chore and very difficult to keep up with. I used to LOVE LOVE LOVE logging. I seem to have been doing very well without it for a while so I think I am going to give it up for an undefined period of time. I have discovered I can trust my body, under normal circumstances. I will keep fine-tuning that skill until I can do it under any and all circumstances. That is the only way for me to succeed long-term. Our bodies are pretty smart, I have found. We just have to work at over-coming the cultural, psychological and emotional aspects of eating and tune into our body's biological signals.
Anyway, off to a busy day today. I get to go onsite and train this morning. Too bad I haven't even looked at the application I am supposed to be trining on, eh? LOL. I should stop messing around and go do that.
Food Total: 919 cals
I think I may be coming down with a cold. My energy has been really low lately and I am stuffy, sneezy and runny and the allergy pills do not seem to help. The cold pills did, however. Hopefully it will just be one of those annoying colds that don't develop beyond annoying. The legs are now down to a bearable soreness. It now feels like I just pushed a little too hard at the gym last night. I power-walked to the Chevron (downhill) to get my cold pills and it was only uncomfortable (walking back uphill), not bringing tears to my eyes! Yay!!!!
We got some more boxes unpacked last night and most of the furniture is in it's "final" resting place. I was also able to get on my size 16 slacks without injuring myself, and without laying down. They are still too tight to wear all day, but I think I will be wearing them in July! That is my next goal.
I am preparing for the training I am giving tomorrow at a client site. I love being back in this field. I love my job. I love my co-workers. And, as soon as I get a weekend to rest, I will love my life once again!
We were supposed to do a road trip July 1 to Omaha, but I just can't bring myself to do it. Mom was pretty upset that I cancelled, but she said that she expected me to becuase of my recent life. I have spent more time in my car over the last 5 weeks than I have the whole year I've owned it--combined. 28 more hours in the car have absolutely no appeal to me, whatsoever. I need to rest. I was supposed to take the 3rd and 5th off from work. I still may do that and just stay home and relax. Lord knows I need it. But, I may have to go back out to Atlanta that week, so I will just wait to see how things shake out.
I went shopping briefly yesterday. I BOUGHT SIZE 18 SLACKS AND TOPS AND I AM WEARING THEM RIGHT NOW. Size 18!!! Yippie, yahoo and woohoo!
I finally got rid of the rest of my 24-26-28 clothes. I now have 6 outfits that fit!
I really enjoyed the past five days with my husband. We need to schedule more of those days like that. Back at work today. Refreshed, in smaller clothes, and happy.
Update: I miss my hubby. I've been thinking about him almost all day. Can't wait to get home. Then we go to the gym. Hopefully we can hit the pool after our workout. I think rather than aiming for 40 minutes of running today, I am going to try 35 minutes without breaking. Sounds do-able.
Food Total: 1334 cals
I have the sweetest husband in the universe. Last night, since my legs were so sore that I couldn't bend over, he put my shoes on for me, picked everything up for me, handed me the contents of the books I was wanting to unpack, and was just so incredibly wonderful to me. I love that man.
I am better this morning but it is still pretty hard to walk/sit/stand. I probably need to be lying on the sofa with my legs straight out in front of me, but I can't justify calling in sick to work, you know? I think I did some damage to my muscles back there...I will lay off the gym this week, though.
I haven't been able to weigh myself in about two weeks, therefore I hadn't measured myself, either. I decided to measure this morning because I wanted to get a feel for if I had gained or lost weight. In the past 15 days I have shrunk 3.5 inches. I'm down 1.25 in the chest, 1 in the waist, 1 in the hips and .25 in the thigh. I have re-discovered knuckles and veins in my hands--and a wrist bone! So, I suppose I have lost some weight. I want to know how much now!!! I am guessing 4 - 7 lbs based on the measurements. But, I will not be able to weigh myself until after I get back from Atlanta on the 17th. I don't want to injur myself any more by going to the gym before I am healed. I don't recall ever being in this much muscle pain before. And those muscles in your legs are big! That's a large area of ouchies!
Update: Legs continue to get better. I noticed that my slacks are starting to get loose, again. I want to see if I can get into my 16's a bit more comfortably tonight. Last time I almost sprained something getting them on. I got to go onsite today with two of my colleagues, as I will Thursday, and we went out to this HORRIBLE mexican restaurant for lunch. I ordered fajitas and they gave me pan cooked chicken. the grease was pooled up on my plate. Yuck. So far, no stomach pains but I am expecting them. Light dinner tonight, I think.
Food Total: 2259 cals
Work work work work work.
My existence = working.
I hurt so bad from working in my nasty house this weekend that I can barely move. My dislike for dogs has been replaced by a disgust. How can you ruin a house in 9 months? That takes a special talent, I believe. No wonder I have had so many showings with no interest. I wouldn't want that nasty pit, either, unless it was discounted several thousand dollars. I am sooooo peeved about this. I don't even know how to get some of that cleaned. How do you get yuck out of grout? A toothbrush and some floor cleaner? OMG. My light gray grout is now black. Holes galore in the walls. Brown walls from the dogs. Stains in the carpet from who knows what? Broken roman shades, that cost me over $1,000!!! And they were so freakin pissy and obsessive about having the house perfect and spotless "for their baby." Nasty nasty nasty.
However, I have never met smokers and dog owners that had high cleanliness standards. I should have known, right? Well, I didn't know that they smoked until I saw them outside smoking one day... I am so angry, and sore, and tired. I hope the house just sells and I will buy one closer to where I live to rent out. This sucks traveling to work so damned hard.
Update: I am going to devote the next paragraph to counting the chickens before they've hatched. Providing that everything checks out, 58% of the large financial risk that I took a few weeks ago will end in my favor this week. There is potential for this part to end even better than expected. The other 42% is still TBD. I still have faith that I did the right thing, despite the absence of logic and reality in the risk. Sometimes your faith calls you to step out of your comfort zone and do something that is completely irrational and that could end VERY badly. But, you have the internal peace and confidence that you are doing the correct thing and "jump in head first"--so to speak...
Food Total: 930 cals
Food has not been good. We went out, again, last night. BUT, after we went out to eat we went to the grocery store and re-stocked with nothin' but the good stuff. Our dishwasher is supposed to be repaired this morning. Life will return to normal when we get back from Dallas on Sunday.
I fear I have gained a touch of weight back as my wedding ring fits me again. It could be water retention from eating out all week, though. My clothes don't feel any tighter. Either way, I am getting my life back under control today. Monday is gym day, with the family in-tow. Maybe I will get the chance to go to the gym this weekend while in Dallas? We'll see how much work the house needs.
I got my first bit of negative feedback from a potential buyer of my house. They didn't like the paint job in the living area. Out of over 20/30 showings, one specifically called out the paint and one cited "cosmetic" issues. All the others say the house is beautiful and shows well. I know that my "decorator" paint job isn't going to appeal to everyone. But would it really turn away someone who really likes the house, except for my taste in paint? I am struggling with this question.
The house really is beautiful, but you'd have to appreciate my taste in color for it to appeal to you. Should I paint over it in a more neutral color? I think that would make the house look ordinary. Oh, I just don't know. Hubby says I am getting all bent out of shape over one prospect that didn't like my choices. I certainly wouldn't let a paint job prevent me from selecting a home. And I didn't with this house we just moved in to. There are red/green/purple roosters stenciled in the nook for crying out loud. It is hideous. That is so easy and so cheap to change, though. I can live with roosters for a while.
What to do...60% of me wants to paint tomorrow, 40% wants to get the required work done and play the rest of the weekend...Maybe I should post this Q in the forum.
Update: Thanks to all of you who chimed in with your opinion! I think I will paint the kitchen...it won't take too long and I can just see the eyes of every guy who walks in there rolling because of the mauve kitchen.
I have felt really bloated and uncomfortable today. I was also reflecting on my eating the past 9-10 days. Even though I have been eating most of my meals out those days, I made healthy choices and I only ate too much one time. That is soomething to be very happy about. I also didn't find myself feeling deprived because I couldn't order the super-fat foods. I didn't even want them. I probably could have done without the bread and chips and salsa, but overall I did well and I didn't have to think about it. If I just would have kept my portions a little tiny bit more in check, it would have been a huge success.
Food Total: 2513 cals
I over-ate yesterday and I thought I had too many calories. My tummy was very upset with me and I was miserable. That is the first time I have done that in four months. Hopefully the last time in several more. I don't think I went too far over in calories, although when you are eating out, it is very hard to tell. I want to go back to the gym very badly. I just don't seem to have the time this week. We have been busy unpacking until 11pm every night. I can't even get all my food logged.
Now I am just whining.
Update: I am finding that I am not very hungry today. Imagine that! I ate between 8 and 9 ounces of salmon last night. That was enough for three people! We go to Dallas this weekend to check on the rental house and visit my Dad. Hopefully it won't be too much work. There is mostly yard repair to be done, from what my Dad tells me. I also need to get the grass greened up. I am looking forward to it, actually. My son has not seen his friends in Dallas in several months. It will be nice to see all my old neighbors, too. Maybe they will notice I've lost weight? Maybe.
